Yesterday afternoon we received the best possible news short of actually receiving our referral (for those not familiar with the lingo yet, a referral is the assignment of children to a family). As I was preparing to leave work, I came across an email from our case worker Sarah. She was giving us the long-awaited update on our paperwork which has been hanging out in the city of Pereira since mid-November. Here is what the email said:
"Great news :) Just spoke with Raul [our agency's Colombian program director] and he thinks you will be getting a referral VERY soon (within the month) from Pereira. SO....he is asking you to look at your documents to see if any need to be redone."
This is not in any way an official promise of children, but it is cause for us to hope big. It may take longer than a month, but it sounds like the powers that be in Pereira may have children in mind for us. In the meantime, we are doing what they are asking of us and getting our paperwork updated. I had already sent off a request letter to U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services to get our fingerprints updated (they expire in May). Our next steps include updating our medical and employment letters, as well as our FBI clearances (yes we have to have two separate sets of fingerprints updated). Other than that, we just keep hoping and praying that our official referral will come anyday now!
Saturday, March 08, 2008
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
People Never Cease To Dumbfound Me
I am sitting at a café that I like to frequent for their yummy sandwiches and free wi-fi. I have some freelance files that I need to upload to an FTP site so this seemed like a perfect fit for me today. Sadly, at lunch time the place is packed out and I the only seat I could find close to an outlet is way in the back where all of the Mommies have gathered for adult conversation while their kids run around and mash play dough on the table next to me. I actually didn't even really notice them until one of the moms pointed out that her child was being wild. I am just thankful to be able to plug my computer in so I can do what I need to do. I was making good progress too until a blog worthy event happened.
There is a toddler at the play dough table. He kept throwing stuff on the floor off of his table. (Isn't this what toddlers do? My beloved nephew Ethan - my only real measuring stick for toddler behavior - throws stuff all the time.) Then the future MLB pitcher's mother comes from another table and picks the items up, tells him not to do it again and apologizes to me. I tell her "no worries." And the dialogue proceeds like this:
Mommy: Well I guess you did sit in the kid section.
Andrea: Yeah I needed the outlet.
M: I am surprised the kids aren't on top of you mashing their fingers into your keyboard.
A: Ah, I am used to it, I have a niece and nephew. I wouldn't have noticed anyway.
M: Well, you should try having them in your house.
The next sound you hear is my jaw hitting the floor. How do you say to someone in an eloquent, non-yelling manner that you have in fact been trying to have a bundle of chaos of your own for four years? Also, not that it is any of her business, but I have lived with my niece and nephew, and I thought it was awesome (I know being Auntie is different from being mommy, but Liana and Ethan are still loads of fun).
The moral of the story here folks is don't express your "stages of life" opinions to strangers. You never know what other people have been through or are currently dealing with.
There is a toddler at the play dough table. He kept throwing stuff on the floor off of his table. (Isn't this what toddlers do? My beloved nephew Ethan - my only real measuring stick for toddler behavior - throws stuff all the time.) Then the future MLB pitcher's mother comes from another table and picks the items up, tells him not to do it again and apologizes to me. I tell her "no worries." And the dialogue proceeds like this:
Mommy: Well I guess you did sit in the kid section.
Andrea: Yeah I needed the outlet.
M: I am surprised the kids aren't on top of you mashing their fingers into your keyboard.
A: Ah, I am used to it, I have a niece and nephew. I wouldn't have noticed anyway.
M: Well, you should try having them in your house.
The next sound you hear is my jaw hitting the floor. How do you say to someone in an eloquent, non-yelling manner that you have in fact been trying to have a bundle of chaos of your own for four years? Also, not that it is any of her business, but I have lived with my niece and nephew, and I thought it was awesome (I know being Auntie is different from being mommy, but Liana and Ethan are still loads of fun).
The moral of the story here folks is don't express your "stages of life" opinions to strangers. You never know what other people have been through or are currently dealing with.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Expecting...
This has been a strange week so far. Two significant things happened that really got me thinking.
The first thing happened on Sunday at church. I saw this beautiful young couple standing together with their adorable daughter who looked like she must be less than one year old. The sadness and envy hit me like a lightning bolt. No matter how hard I try, I am never prepared for when this feeling will hit. It is more than a longing for something that I don't yet have. It is mourning for something that will never be. Our path is different.
The second thing happened yesterday at work. I was at an orientation for new full-time employees and as we went around the room introducing ourselves one of the women added that she and her husband recently found out that they are expecting. This is the point when I usually tear up and want to run out of the room so I can have a good cry. Unexpectedly, the opposite happened. I found myself genuinely joyful for her and cheering her on. Afterall, we are expecting too.
This is the constant state of flux that I live in from day-to-day. It is so hard to explain, and even harder for others who have not been in our situation to understand. We don't get the excitement of watching my belly grow, going to ultrasounds, and feeling the baby kick. We get to update our FBI clearances and wait on pins and needles for good news from our caseworker. I think that I have really been stuck on the waiting aspect of this whole process. In reality, Troy and I are truly expecting. We may have the gestational period of an elephant, but each day brings us closer to our children.
The first thing happened on Sunday at church. I saw this beautiful young couple standing together with their adorable daughter who looked like she must be less than one year old. The sadness and envy hit me like a lightning bolt. No matter how hard I try, I am never prepared for when this feeling will hit. It is more than a longing for something that I don't yet have. It is mourning for something that will never be. Our path is different.
The second thing happened yesterday at work. I was at an orientation for new full-time employees and as we went around the room introducing ourselves one of the women added that she and her husband recently found out that they are expecting. This is the point when I usually tear up and want to run out of the room so I can have a good cry. Unexpectedly, the opposite happened. I found myself genuinely joyful for her and cheering her on. Afterall, we are expecting too.
This is the constant state of flux that I live in from day-to-day. It is so hard to explain, and even harder for others who have not been in our situation to understand. We don't get the excitement of watching my belly grow, going to ultrasounds, and feeling the baby kick. We get to update our FBI clearances and wait on pins and needles for good news from our caseworker. I think that I have really been stuck on the waiting aspect of this whole process. In reality, Troy and I are truly expecting. We may have the gestational period of an elephant, but each day brings us closer to our children.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Still just waiting...
I think that knowing that we are closer to getting a referral makes waiting that much harder. Though we have no real timeline or deadline, it is the not knowing that's driving me crazy. It is nearly impossible to have a balanced life in the midst of waiting for something so big. I feel like I have allowed myself to get lost in my work more because it makes the days go by so fast. If there weren't a writer's strike going on, I would be camped out with my DVR much more often. Although I greatly appreciate all of the encouragement about how we should enjoy this time to ourselves, Troy and I have had nearly five years of sleeping in, eating out, enjoying the freedom of travelling whenever we choose, and date nights without worrying about finding a sitter. But with that five years also comes the comfort of routine and the constant longing for something more...We are ready for our world to be flipped upside down. We are ready (so to speak) for diapers and feedings and getting less sleep (in all fairness Baxter wakes us up at 3:30 AM every morning--when he is awake, everyone else should be too). We are ready for our house to be filled to the brim with kids and dogs. I look forward to having toys everywhere and little kids clothes to wash. I look forward to going to the park and cooking meals for five. I know that our becoming parents will in no way complete us or make us whole, but it will catapult us into the next phase of life that we have been preparing for since we took our vows. So, for all of the nay-sayers who think we are crazy to bring three children into our home all at once, please keep in mind that this is what we were created for.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
With one big leap of faith...
...we are "officially" kicking off of our fundraising efforts. This is an extremely scary process. Troy and I are very self-reliant and would much rather pay for everything ourselves than have to ask anyone for anything. The reality of our adoption, however, is that we simply can't afford the entire cost on our own. It is a very humbling situation to be in for two particular reasons: 1) it is a true test of our faith in God's provision and 2) we are put in the awkward position of having to ask our family and friends to help us "pay" for our children (so to speak).
Skeptics may ask why we are attempting to adopt without having the entire cost already saved up. Our answer is simple, we believe that we are doing what we are meant to do at the exact moment we are meant to do it. When we made the switch from pursuing our children medically to pursuing our children through adoption, we did so with A LOT of prayer. There is no doubt in our hearts or minds that we have been specifically called to adopt...three siblings...from Colombia...right now.
Over the next few days, some of you will receive packets in the mail that contain a letter and some other information. We ask that you prayerfully consider what your role - if any - in our adoption may be. Some of you who are able may want to donate a monetary gift. Some of you who are true prayer warriors may know how and what to pray for us. Please know that however you feel you can help is truly of great help to us. The most important thing we hope you will get out of this post is that we don't want you to feel obligated. We also want to assure our faithful readers that the posts from here on out will not be solely about fundraising (thought updates will be given!)
If anyone is interested in receiving a packet of information on our fundraising efforts or if you have any questions, please send one of us an email. I am working on how to get all of the information up on our blog. And though this is a scary time for us, it is also extremly exciting. We have been waiting months to start this process and are so joyful to be entering this phase of the adoption.
Love,
Andrea (andrealwe@yahoo.com) and
Troy (taeisenberger@yahoo.com)
Skeptics may ask why we are attempting to adopt without having the entire cost already saved up. Our answer is simple, we believe that we are doing what we are meant to do at the exact moment we are meant to do it. When we made the switch from pursuing our children medically to pursuing our children through adoption, we did so with A LOT of prayer. There is no doubt in our hearts or minds that we have been specifically called to adopt...three siblings...from Colombia...right now.
Over the next few days, some of you will receive packets in the mail that contain a letter and some other information. We ask that you prayerfully consider what your role - if any - in our adoption may be. Some of you who are able may want to donate a monetary gift. Some of you who are true prayer warriors may know how and what to pray for us. Please know that however you feel you can help is truly of great help to us. The most important thing we hope you will get out of this post is that we don't want you to feel obligated. We also want to assure our faithful readers that the posts from here on out will not be solely about fundraising (thought updates will be given!)
If anyone is interested in receiving a packet of information on our fundraising efforts or if you have any questions, please send one of us an email. I am working on how to get all of the information up on our blog. And though this is a scary time for us, it is also extremly exciting. We have been waiting months to start this process and are so joyful to be entering this phase of the adoption.
Love,
Andrea (andrealwe@yahoo.com) and
Troy (taeisenberger@yahoo.com)
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Yeah, in the end it's all Life Changing
It's Troy here....for those of you who were worried that Andrea had me locked in the garage, that simply was not true (although your concern is appreciated). A nice run on the greenway helped me find something to write about. Also, Andrea is quite sick. I came back from Harris Teeter with enough cold medicine that I'm sure I'm now on some watchlist in North Carolina for starting a meth lab. Which depending how the fundraising goes is something we may look into (I'm of course kidding..... Really...just kidding...can't say that enough).
It's snowing in Charlotte as I write this. This is nice after the drought, as our brown yard is now white. Green is likely at least a year away. I just got back from running 11 miles, which in 37 degree and raining weather, gave me time to clear my head, while the rest of me was freezing. The thought that stayed in my head throughout the run as I thought about the adoption, was "are we ready for this"?
The phrase we continually hear is that "this will change your life." While my first reaction is to be flip (as comedian Louis CK said..."Of course my life is changing...now I have a BABY"), we of course recognize this as a life-changing event. Getting a dog changed our lives, getting a second dog changed our lives (the merit of this decision is still being debated), getting a Trader Joe's down the street from us changed our lives -and yes, this will be the biggest change of all. When the words "this will change your life" are spoken as a soft warning, I tend to appreciate and value it. It comes across from parents saying, enjoy your free time now, and truly providing constructive and thoughtful advice.
When those words come across with a touch of disbelief, they are frequently coupled with phrases like "do you know what you're getting yourself into?" & "are you sure you're ready for this?". I'm always caught slightly off guard by these questions. Do I say that we think that most parents are martyrs and we expect this to be pretty easy and wait for a reaction? We of course do and don't know what we are getting ourselves into. Are we doing our best to fundraise, work extra jobs, get our house as bebe ready as possible? Of course. Are we going to be surprised, challenged, caught off guard, amazed and a myriad of others things we don't know about? We expect and welcome this.
Being 100% ready for kids would mean buying cold medicine the day before they get sick; placing a pile of pillows down on the deck right before they fall and break their arm. All this to say, we truly trust in God's provision and believe that we will be as ready as we need to be. We probably weren't "ready" to be married, but the last almost 5 years have been amazing and I wouldn't change a thing (maybe the Seahawks/Packers game, but that's likely out of my power).
We are currently working on many phases of the process at all times, and it seems more and more real ever day. Reading others blogs, especially those traveling right now (like the Armstrong's wonderful blog), have become addicting - as we share the excitment of those traveling, and can't help put ourselves in the experiences that await us.
We look forward to being ready and being not ready. After years and years of waiting to bring home our bebes, we would certainly have it no other way.
Much Love,
Troy and Andi
It's snowing in Charlotte as I write this. This is nice after the drought, as our brown yard is now white. Green is likely at least a year away. I just got back from running 11 miles, which in 37 degree and raining weather, gave me time to clear my head, while the rest of me was freezing. The thought that stayed in my head throughout the run as I thought about the adoption, was "are we ready for this"?
The phrase we continually hear is that "this will change your life." While my first reaction is to be flip (as comedian Louis CK said..."Of course my life is changing...now I have a BABY"), we of course recognize this as a life-changing event. Getting a dog changed our lives, getting a second dog changed our lives (the merit of this decision is still being debated), getting a Trader Joe's down the street from us changed our lives -and yes, this will be the biggest change of all. When the words "this will change your life" are spoken as a soft warning, I tend to appreciate and value it. It comes across from parents saying, enjoy your free time now, and truly providing constructive and thoughtful advice.
When those words come across with a touch of disbelief, they are frequently coupled with phrases like "do you know what you're getting yourself into?" & "are you sure you're ready for this?". I'm always caught slightly off guard by these questions. Do I say that we think that most parents are martyrs and we expect this to be pretty easy and wait for a reaction? We of course do and don't know what we are getting ourselves into. Are we doing our best to fundraise, work extra jobs, get our house as bebe ready as possible? Of course. Are we going to be surprised, challenged, caught off guard, amazed and a myriad of others things we don't know about? We expect and welcome this.
Being 100% ready for kids would mean buying cold medicine the day before they get sick; placing a pile of pillows down on the deck right before they fall and break their arm. All this to say, we truly trust in God's provision and believe that we will be as ready as we need to be. We probably weren't "ready" to be married, but the last almost 5 years have been amazing and I wouldn't change a thing (maybe the Seahawks/Packers game, but that's likely out of my power).
We are currently working on many phases of the process at all times, and it seems more and more real ever day. Reading others blogs, especially those traveling right now (like the Armstrong's wonderful blog), have become addicting - as we share the excitment of those traveling, and can't help put ourselves in the experiences that await us.
We look forward to being ready and being not ready. After years and years of waiting to bring home our bebes, we would certainly have it no other way.
Much Love,
Troy and Andi
Friday, January 11, 2008
"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but desire fulfilled is a tree of life." ~Proverbs 13:12
For those of you who do not know, I work for the YMCA of Greater Charlotte. The "C" in YMCA actually stands for Christian which means that I get to freely live out my faith on a daily basis at work. Having worked in non-Christian environments before, I cannot even begin to express how meaningful it is to work at a place where we have devotions and prayer at the beginning of most meetings. This verse about hope came from the devotion in a meeting I had this morning. Needless to say, it bowled me over.
In all of these of years of waiting and longing for parenthood, I had not heard this verse before. I am not sure I can accurately describe the instant rush of emotion that I felt when I first read it. It is just truly beautiful. I think that the best way to describe it is that I felt like God was saying "I understand what you feel." I know on the most basic level of my faith that He, of course, knows what we feel--after all we are created in His image. But this verse felt personal. I can't remember a time when I have ever waited for something for so long, and for there to be a verse in the Bible that describes what long periods of waiting does to your heart is just...so comforting. I don't know why I am so surprised that such comfort and empathy exists in the Word, but I am glad I was reminded of it today.
On a side note, and going back meetings and the Y, the joke at our branch is that the "M" stands for "Meetings" since all we seem to do is go from meeting to meeting.
Hope you all are doing well!
For those of you who do not know, I work for the YMCA of Greater Charlotte. The "C" in YMCA actually stands for Christian which means that I get to freely live out my faith on a daily basis at work. Having worked in non-Christian environments before, I cannot even begin to express how meaningful it is to work at a place where we have devotions and prayer at the beginning of most meetings. This verse about hope came from the devotion in a meeting I had this morning. Needless to say, it bowled me over.
In all of these of years of waiting and longing for parenthood, I had not heard this verse before. I am not sure I can accurately describe the instant rush of emotion that I felt when I first read it. It is just truly beautiful. I think that the best way to describe it is that I felt like God was saying "I understand what you feel." I know on the most basic level of my faith that He, of course, knows what we feel--after all we are created in His image. But this verse felt personal. I can't remember a time when I have ever waited for something for so long, and for there to be a verse in the Bible that describes what long periods of waiting does to your heart is just...so comforting. I don't know why I am so surprised that such comfort and empathy exists in the Word, but I am glad I was reminded of it today.
On a side note, and going back meetings and the Y, the joke at our branch is that the "M" stands for "Meetings" since all we seem to do is go from meeting to meeting.
Hope you all are doing well!
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